For most of us, eating out is a simple luxury that fulfills one simple need: to stave off starvation in the laziest way possible. But for others, eating out is a form of entertainment akin to a 1920s freakshow or the act of ogling a tuft of chin hairs on one's own grandmother.
And thankfully for those of us who simply wish to shovel in our nutrients without smoke and mirrors, these gourmands tend to pen themselves in temporary "pop-up" restaurants. Here are four new restaurants you should probably avoid, unless you consider carbohydrates and Vitamin B12 performance art.
4 Tink's House Wants You to Get Intimate With Strangers
Tink's House in Los Angeles describes itself as "an immersive dining experience and sensory installation where the food and the environment work together to present familiar concepts in an unfamiliar way," which reads like a tacit admission that the proprietors have fuck-all to say about the quality of the food itself.
Diners are placed in a group of strangers and served four courses in four rooms with different themes: a den, a dining room, a kitchen, and a bedroom. For example, snack-like appetizers are served in the den, which is covered in sand and plays "trippy" music to suggest that you're at the beach, even though you're clearly in an apartment that's probably used to film porn and/or sell drugs in the off-hours.
"Does anyone have sunscreen? I always get burned at the beach."