4 Reasons Bitcoin Hoarders Are Screwed

4

Bitcoins Are Easy to Lose

Being a virtual currency, Bitcoin doesn't exist in the real world. The reason why Bitcoin and other cryptocurrencies like Dogecoin (no, seriously, this is a thing) are so popular is because users transfer the currency directly between each other and don't require a middleman like PayPal or a bank. (This also explains why Internet drug dealers are oh so fond of cryptocurrencies.)

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Other people required a little more convincing.

3

A Few Really Devoted People Could Tank Bitcoin

Unlike real-world currencies, Bitcoin isn't regulated by a central bank or government. So where do bitcoins come from? Here's an extremely pared-down explanation: When Bitcoin was programmed into existence, a massive "mine" of bitcoins popped into the virtual world that is the Internet. Bitcoin miners obtain new bitcoins using incredibly powerful computers that consume insane amounts of electricity.

2

Yes, You Have to Pay Taxes on Bitcoins

Taxes don't disappear just because you flipped your country's currency the bird. Every single transaction you take part in using Bitcoin must be listed with your taxes, and the entire process is confusing as fuck. Hell, even the IRS isn't 100 percent sure what the deal is.

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"If you look at the form, it all falls under Article: Fuck You, Subsection: Pay Us."

1

And It's Not Entirely Anonymous

If nothing else, everyone should know the biggest praise of Bitcoin -- anonymity. Well, too bad that's bullshit. Every transaction that is made is stored on a public record, with information from both accounts and the number of bitcoins exchanged. And this isn't just a minor mistake that can be fixed with a few code changes. The structure of Bitcoin requires records for everything to ensure that the same coins aren't being used more than once, and recent university studies suggest that users are more traceable than they think.

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"Wow, this guy really likes Space Jam."

So while we're not saying that Bitcoin is definitely a no-go, we are saying that it's a bit more like Mars: The first colonizers are probably fucked, but down the pike it could be viable for everyday folks. Y'know, after all the space cannibals die off.

The third part of XJ's epic science-fiction novel is out now on Amazon. The first $0.99 novella can be found here, with Part 2 out here. Or leave a review and get a free copy! Poke him on Twitter and follow him on Facebook.

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