NBC, Fox, BBC, and even Discovery have been reporting that experts fear for Nessie's life since spottings have ranged from "nil" to "zip" in the past 18 months, creating international attention for a headline straight out of the supermarket checkout. Oh, but that's not the dumbest part of this whole non-story ...
news.stv.tv, dailyrecord.co.uk, ecorazzi.com
"Nessie joins other notable deaths: journalism and trying."
... which also made headlines in 2010. How many times is it worth reporting that something that didn't exist in the first place has ceased to exist? We haven't found that number yet, because back in 2008 a similar expert was already telling us that the monster had been killed by global warming.
Listen, guys -- we're not telling you what to believe in. But either add resurrection to Nessie's list of powers or shut up about it dying.
Obamacare Isn't Going to Kill 2 Million Jobs
President Obama must feel pretty proud that his health care reform is (apparently) so miraculously absent from real flaws that we have to make up fakes ones. For instance, now that we've all been injected with the mandatory microchip that forces us to give 90 percent of our income to abortions for LGBT immigrants per order of the Illuminati god Baphomet, some sites are exposing the harsh realities of Obamacare:
"More like Obamadoesn'tcare. Right, guys?" -comment sections, probably
These two headlines from Yahoo and the Washington Times bring up two very important questions: 1) What is a CBO? and 2) Is Obama cutting 2 million work hours or 2 million jobs? To answer the first, it stands for the Congressional Budget Office. And for number two, the answer is neither.
It turns out that the study by the Budget Office didn't conclude that Obamacare was "cutting" anything, but rather creating less need for people to hold down full-time jobs. However, "You May Be Able to Retire Earlier" doesn't sound quite as clickable as "ANTICHRIST DESTROYS U.S. ECONOMY," so we can see why sites would go with the latter option.
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