If beer is more your speed / liver function, the ingenious fellows at PourMyBeer.com have developed the aptly named Pour My Beer system, which allows customers to serve their own damn brews right at their table, or at a trough of taps on the wall. You load up a card with Pour My Beer Funbucks, swipe it, and the tap subtracts however much you dispensed into your funnel. Be warned, however, that you can't just load the card with $50,000 and be set for, like, two weeks -- you can only charge enough credit for two beverages at a time because of a little thing called "making sure the human race doesn't go extinct by next year."
"Estimated hangover level: tree trunk through the forehead."
And finally, there's PicoBrew, a frattier version of a coffeemaker that takes all the ingredients you need and spits out 2.5 gallons of Imperial IPA, a type of beer that generally takes about a week to make, in a mere four hours. It can even connect to an online database of recipes which includes "clones" of famous beers. Yes, you can now download pirated booze. The dream is real.
One day, dear friends. One day.