Every eatery wants to stand out, and there's no better opportunity than to make your mark on the one day of the year when 60 percent of North America eats like it's a competitive sport.
So yes, we understand the impulse to be innovative, but lately restaurateurs seem to be treating Thanksgiving like some sort of science fair of the damned. And just like The Re-Animator or The Fly, the results are all too often something you'd much rather kill with a flamethrower than put in your mouth ...
4 Turkey Doughnuts
It's pretty hard to fuck up a doughnut, and yet the eldritch pastry magicians over at Zucker Bakery in New York City have done just that by combining the pastry delights of Hanukkah with the jagged meat helpings of Thanksgiving.
"And so they gave thanks that the one bottle of Pepto-Bismol was able to last for the eight days of diarrhea."