Mexican Restaurant Gives People Explosive Diarrhea, Offers Free Burritos
All right, so your restaurant accidentally gave 74 people E. coli and caused the now infamous "bloody diarrhea outbreak." Fine, everyone makes mistakes. What's important now is gaining some goodwill in the community and making them forget about the gory poovalanches you caused. Just do anything possible to distance your business from the concept of diarrhea, or pooping in general. Maybe do a promotion, like offering free sandwiches, or ...
"Federico's: An explosion of flavor."
... fr-free burritos. That works, too, we guess. Yes, and put the words "COME BACK" in big red letters (red all over the place, in fact), right next to those big, juicy burritos. Oh, those things are just ready to burst. If you'll excuse us for a moment now, though, we have to pay a visit to the nearest trash bin.
In all seriousness, we're not sure how well Federico's promotion worked, considering that half their clientele was probably still glued to the toilet.
"For the rest we had the 'Queen of Clean' on standby just in case."