The 26 Stupidest Invention Ideas (You'd Use Every Day)

A lot of idiotic patents make it all the way to production, and society ends up worse for it. We asked our readers to show us the idiotic patents that would actually help improve things. The winner is below, but first the runners-up ...

26
Entry by GallopGhost

Electric Spoon Device for the Cooling of Hot Soup On Off Button Air Intake Decorative Head Cool AC Power Air Thermoelectric Refrigeration Spoon Unit

25

Escalator Impasse Escalator 1. Person blocking whole escalator. 2. Giant hand clears walking 2 1 space. 3. Activate it by pushing a button. 3 CRACKEDC

24
Entry by HaywireLiar

No. 34981230 Patented 3/30/2012 Traffic Jam Blue Shell Angry Driver b Phone Driver Blue Shell bi 1 Blue Shel1 bl Cell phone c1 Targeting c1 Camera c

23
Entry by MouseGuy

U.S. Patent March 545 26 2013 CRACKED'COM Paper cut prevention device Fig. 2 Fig. 1 Fig. Fig. 4 3 Rubbe tubing wrapped around the edge of EVerY indivi

22
Entry by KBekman

Press to Activate Brights from Car Talk-to-Text Microphone Reflected by Miror Fig. 5A Turn 4 your highbeans. Ashole Fig. SB CRAGREDCON

21
Entry by Ricky2Dope

Digital T-Shirt Cannon Advanced Clothing Delivery System 3 1 2b 2a 100101001010101 $ 100110100110010 101001101001010 101100101010010 101010101001010 1

20
Entry by Perusse

Automated Keyboard Cleaner Xmas Keyboard Light Computer. Timer NOTE: Top Rack Only! Unmodified Dishwasher

19
Entry by Perusse

MEOW 1. 2. CRAGKED

18

CRAGKEDCON, Wal-mart Line Monitor App Register types WAL-MART Available LINE MONITOR registers Open Reaistens: Spesaly Self Balts Cnack 2 Average Line

17
Entry by HaywireLiar

The 26 Stupidest Invention Ideas (You'd Use Every Day)

16
Entry by Dblbch

CRAGKED Device to prevent your foot from stepping on a lego brick D I call it shoe

15
Entry by John Mulroy

CRAGKEDCOM 1.Hate Cannon Detects mindless hatred and releases Mace 2.L337-Seeking Missile US Patent Application #20132019584523 Big Billy Goat Gruff

14
Entry by John Mulroy

Patent application US2013024586945 No-Fly Zone Hat 1.Hat. Contains mind-controlled CPU A 2. Ara ture. Can cover entire face 3.Sensors. Detectinsects

13
Entry by HaywireLiar

No. 74217829 CRACKEDCON Wireless Motion-Based System For Retaliation Against Televised Assholes 4 7 1 2 6 3 13 10 1. Viewer 2. Television 8 3. Console

12
Entry by Hans_Solo

CRACKED Phone Interaction Solicitation Solving Electronic Deterrent Code Name: PISSED Activation Button CLD 1X CTXDODID When Activated 10.000 WATT Amp

11
Entry by AM Smiley

HIDE-A- BONER SIDE VIEW: MIMICS STACK OF TEXTBOOKSO REAR VIEW: HOLLOW TO HIDE EMBARRASSING BULGE CRACKEDCON

10
Entry by Hans_Solo

The 26 Stupidest Invention Ideas (You'd Use Every Day)

9
Entry by mightyzamfir

Device To Prevent Automobile Cut-off Fid.1 Pig.2 (closed) (open Right) Fig.3: side View (Open Left) In the event of a cut off scenario: 1. Driver ac

8
Entry by beefybooyawn

1 1-Easy Grip Handle 2a 2-Dingleberry Comb 2a-Left Cheek Comb 2b-Right Cheek Comb 3-Long Comb For Cheeks 2b of Differing Sizes 3 CRAGKED

7
Entry by bullamakanka

CRAGKEDCON fig 1. ZZZ 00 A B DOO C Low-Impact Traffic Prompting Device designed to apply Slow Hand On Vehicle Exterior (SHOVE) Fig I. Demonstrates s

6
Entry by frenchfood

CRACKED MOVIE WATCHING EXPERIENCEENHANCER2000 HIGHLY SENSITIVE DIRECTIONAL MICROPHONE TALKING DETERRENT CORPSE REMOVER BLAH BLAH

5
Entry by Ted E.

Automatic Spring-Action 113 110 Mobile Phone Theft 111 Deterrent System 113a 113 Unknown 113b Detected User 113c Security Measures 143 Activated 120 1

Apparatus For Avoiding Shoe Nuisance People Light Inversion Power Processing Head Emission Emission Refetor Renestor Proeessing Enerky 199 System 1. S

3
Entry by El Zoof

CRACKEDCO CON Automatic Back-scratcher Itch feelers Gripping talons Scratching fangs CPU Prosoma (Cephalothorax) Pedicel Bio-waste Skin harvesters p

2
Entry by AM Smiley

SHOE DE-POOPER B HAAP.E A A BAG DISPENSER B. DISPOSAL BAGS C.BAG CLAMP 1. STEP. 2. EXTEND BAG, 3. DISCARD. TURNING INSIDE OUT CRACKEDCON TO CONTAIN PO

1
Entry by visn418

Green Light - to cell phone electrocution system Fig. 1 Fig. 2 Fig. 3 Electric shock sent Person looking down Light turns green to all CRACKEDCON near

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