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23 Painfully Honest Valentine's Day Cards

People play Valentine's Day pretty safe. Kids send the same cards featuring famous cartoon characters. Adults use Hallmark to write blandly complimentary things to each other. We asked you to show us what it would look like if people used valentines to express the awkward, vulnerable truth. The winner is below, but first the runners up ...

23
Entry by Randall Marsh

CRACKED.cOM I'm So Glad we're Friends So I can finally download all of your facebook photos.

22
Entry by stevefulton

Classroom Obligation CRACKED: com

21

PLeas CRACKED.cOM a Be MiME T AM SO LOAELY CRAZY FOR YOO

20
Entry by RMThompson

ditch last my is sonvince to not This am effort. Jon arents/ my Jay CRACKED.cOM

19
Entry by roguematt

DEAR MOMMY, TEACHER MADE US GLUE STUFF SOME TOGETHER. THEN LATE THE GLUE CRACKED.COM

18
Entry by maluba

don't know WA7 my friends are talking about... You're totally not out of my league CRACKED.cOM

17
Entry by CapnPixter

Happy Valentines Day! chocolate I bought you told becanse Wikipedia me its apnrodisiacs an tonight Please put out CRACKEDCID

16
Entry by AzISeeIt

CRACKED.COM my Darling if will you marry me... ... I promise to cherish your citizenship like it's my own

15
Entry by hoomhum

u BATE 2U CRACKED HOM

14
Entry by Randall Marsh

You're pretty close to the top of the list in my spank-bank (if you don't count pornstars, pop singers, co-workers, fictional characters, or Scarlett

13
Entry by HamFan

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY To the MOST amazingly beautiful, unbelievably attractive and sexiest woman in the world... ...that could get. For now. CRACKED.C

12
Entry by matteoms

23 Painfully Honest Valentine's Day Cards

11
Entry by Jungling

After ten years I'm happy to say, I still want you every day. Please wear your glasses when we play, So can pretend you're Tina Fey. CRACKED .COM

10
Entry by AM Smiley

Propose or we're done. CRACKED.cOM

9
Entry by cmsmith

You'Il Do CRACKED.cOM

8

Baby, you are the Love of my life. Only you are SO Wonderful and giving. Just want to Offer my love to my Beautiful woman. PLEASE be mine this Valenti

7

CRACKEDATOM To SCOTT NOT EVEN BATMAN CAN MAKE GIVING AN OBUIGITORY GRADE SCHOOL VALENTINE'S CARD TO YOUR GUY FRIENDS ANY LESS HOMOEROTIC! Juuls! Wo SH

6
Entry by Ted E.

CRACKED.COM $4 $95 card. Conrov'e. $270 effort days: hallmasl from 364 LERO necklace. nert the Tiffany putting Overprice, for with overpriced y away T

5
Entry by roguematt

LOVE COUPON Hey Sweetie! GOOD FOR ONE FREE: I'm too lazy and/o or GET OUT oF SEX NIGHT cheap Bearer is entitled to night free of having to to go out a

4
Entry by mrlarry

CRACKED.cOM I'mthe ONY oNe for me

3
Entry by HaywireLiar

Our Story of Love (Fill in the Blanhs/) astly the saw ckest you part of into the bar that you, - come nigha to be was totally esa said to my buddy,

2
Entry by aerodynamite

Sweethearct NY LOVE E MIN Gina, should invest in You probably blinds for apartment. come your -The the guy in buches LL BE LOvT 700 AAL SHEST ME USEK

1
Entry by auntiewarhol

...for the beoze that brought together US ...and the lazy codependence that keeps together. US CRACKED.COM

Related:

Spite Houses: The Architectural Monuments to People's Grudges
Want in on this?

Next week's contests:

  1. If Signs Were Actually Helpful
  2. Real-Life Plot Twists That Explain Everything
  3. Video Games as Understood by Old People
  4. What Movie Background Characters are Thinking/Saying

There are FOUR contests for you to choose from, the three standard photoplasties, and a fourth that requires a little writing. Click on the prompt that catches your fancy, and post your entry in the thread, or submit to all four and quadruple your chances of becoming rich and famous. Winner gets 5,000 pennies.