Cracked Storytime: The Trek Through The Stars Of The MOEBIUS-47

Cracked fans are a creative lot, and when given a chance to prove it, we know they won't ever disappoint. Like in our previous installments, we gave our readers a prompt on Facebook, and let them finish the story. We asked you to tell us what happened next when...


80 M CU-315 CRACKED COM "The crew of the Starcutter MOEBIUS-47 gathered around the porthole completely silent. Through the tint of their ship's radiation shielding, they could make out a blurry form floating off the starboard bow."


80 CU-315 "Sparkles of light radiated from the unknown object." --Nicholas C.


80 3 CU-315 CRACKED COM "A giant space boner!" --Jon E.


80 TINK!* did it CU-315 CRACKED COM "Somehow, the captain's dildo had escaped the ship yet again, and no one would admit to being the culprit." --Robert S.


80 I did it CU-315 CRACKED COM "It was only then that the Space Giraffe revealed itself." --T.J. R.


HOWDY! 80 I did it CU-315 CRACKED COM "It was a space cowboy, Bet you weren't ready for that." --Kyle M.


80 I did it CU-315 DAGNABIT. CRACKED COM "It could not figure out how to enter the ship, as no matter how many times she circled it, all the signs said the door was on the other side." --Joseph J.


80 Tele Acif I did it CU-315 CRACKED COM "The space giraffe was beside herself with feelings of revulsion and contempt. Where are the goddamn tree-fronds, she thought?" --Erik V.


80 CU-315 CRACKED COM "At that point the Space Giraffe had no other choice but to eat them." --Jennifer K.


BANG! crunch crunch BANG BAN BAR 8.0 A320 F5 CRACKED COM "Another very, very loud slam was heard behind them. They all turned swiftly towards the noise..." --Rob L.


8.0 8l A320.F5 CRACKED.COM "Damn. Space crabs." --Rachel S.


08 NI ALOSCA "Then came the wolves." --Randy S.


GIT BACK. YA' 'VARMINTS! Iincomming call SPACE EMPEROR EBEOIJF CRACKED COM "Spoiler: everybody dies!" --Octav I.


CRACKED COM "Shia watched in horror as the murderous crabs overtook the ship." --Zach D.


1 "But it was what was in the distance that frightened them the most." --Will R.


1 "Is that a... *squints*... 21st century vehicle with a dummy in the drivers seat?" --Adam M.


Cracked Storytime: The Trek Through The Stars Of The MOEBIUS-47"Suddenly the piece of space garbage struck the outer hull causing the ship to explode. The end." --Leo L.


GRACKED STORYTIME FOR EDITORIAL REVIEW "This is why we can't have nice things." --Justin M.