herrsignor The Occident

Real Name: Jeff Beauvoir

Member Since: November 6th, 2010

About Me:
Spent my twenties hacking away at a music career in Seattle, during which time I released a couple self-produced albums, got some national radio airplay (charting on the College Music Journal), and contributed music to MTV's 'The Real World'. But what the heck, man, I'm not a rock star, I'm a writer. When not plying my day job in the concert/theatre biz, I write for the web, produce short films and waste time at Cracked.com. With my feature script 'Branded' I was a finalist in a handful of script competitions and won grand prize for thrillers in the New York Screenplay Contest. By Jove I will get a feature film off the ground if I can ever find my way out of this Officer Big Mac climb-in jail playground.

(Please note that I endeavor to write on filthy topics using clean language. No f-explosions. No invoking the names of deities. This is partly based on my personal Sunny Jim values but is also an aesthetic choice. So if you find any off color language in my articles, it was most likely added by the Cracked editors. Mind you, I am not complaining. It is my own choice to contribute articles to a website that's nasty as it wanna be. And I do generally like the Cracked editors' writing style and great ear for comedy. I just want my friends to know where the gutter bombs are coming from. Peace!)