You might not realize it, but some of the behaviors that get you swirlied today were survival strategies that kept you alive thousands of years ago.
Now, we're not telling you not to get an education -- everybody knows employers these days want a degree. But we'd be remiss if we didn't take a moment to celebrate some of the amazing achievements from people who had virtually no education at all.
We've already pointed out that animals are capable of building pretty impressive cities, but at least they're not driving around the streets in little beaver sedans and amassing armies of spider war-jets, right? Horribly, we're not too far from that reality, either.
Your weird quirks don't make you a quirky snowflake. They make you a medical textbook entry.
The brain can fool the body into thinking it's sick, complete with physical symptoms. And we're not talking about bullshit symptoms like headaches, either.
In science fiction, there's no problem a good giant robot suit can't solve. And yet, in reality, we all commute to work in dumb ol' cars, fight our wars with boring guns, and make bland love with our decidedly non-mechanical genitals. Where are our mechs, science? Where are our god damn mechs?! Oh wait, here they are. Sorry about that, Science.
Experts say you can tell a whole lot of intimate details about a person just by looking at them. It's not magic and it's not 100 percent. But it is science.
If each site is, in fact, capable of uniting perfect matches, then solving the epic love triangle between Cyclops, Wolverine and Jean shouldn't be too much to ask. My research, flawless. My findings, staggering. The study, below.
Science: Ruining campfire stories since 1625.
Apparently there are some things even the commercials don't tell you. Not necessarily because the side effects are too terrifying (though some are), but simply because some of them sound more like ironic gypsy curses than anything science is capable of.