Cracked Archive - History
The 10 Greatest Uses of Trash Talk in the History of War
History records some badass trash talk that would put Schwarzenegger to shame, some spoken in dire circumstances. Of course, it takes a certain type of badass.
- Authors
- By Jacopo della Quercia
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- Comments
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746
746 5 Ways the Invention of Pants Shaped the Modern World
What would you say is the single biggest source or symbol of your strength and power as an individual? The answer is easy: just look down. We're talking, of course, about your pants.
- Authors
- By Alexia Franklin
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- 626
5 Untrained Civilians Who Took On Armies
Regular people get pushed, and sometimes they push back. Hard.
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- By Evan V. Symon
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- 470
5 Embarrassing Failures History Class Turned Into Victories
Sometimes history is written by wishful thinking. When the real event isn't quite inspirational or romantic enough, we just make up a prettier version and call it history.
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- By John Champion
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- 1454
The 7 Most Terrifying Pirates from History
Between Johnny Depp and numerous sports logos, pirates have become cartoon characters in modern culture. It's easy to forget that the real thing did exist, and that in many cases they were much more badass than the Hollywood version.
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- By Eric Yosomono, Jean Flynn
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- Comments
- 523
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6 Weird Fashions From History (With Weirder Explanations)
If you intend to do any traveling in a time machine, you'd better invest a whole lot of money in costumes. After all, people in the past looked weird. Why the hell did they, for instance, wear giant white wigs everywhere?
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- By Eric Yosomono
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- Comments
- 1202
7 'Ancient' Forms of Mysticism That Are Recent Inventions
Some 'ancient' practices are about as authentic as the ill-fated Chinese tattoo on your arm that the lady swore meant 'pure warrior.'
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- By C. Coville
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- Comments
- 1598
The 6 Most Amazing Military Raids of All-Time
Just a handful of men can change the world. Particularly if those men are highly trained and heavily armed and possess next to no instincts for self-preservation. These are the soldiers whose job is to fling themselves into impossible situations, against ridiculous odds, where failure means a lot of other people will die.
- Authors
- By Tony Pilgram
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- Comments
- 796
8 Filthy Jokes Hidden in Ancient Works of Art
No matter how far back you go, dick jokes have been the driving force behind mankind's sense of humor. Even ancient figures and civilizations we tend to think of as wise and dignified weren't shy about whipping out some solid boner jokes, even when creating works of art for royalty.
- Authors
- By Tom Lagana
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- 580
5 Forgotten Revolutions That Created The Modern World
We may never have had 'Darling Nikki' if it hadn't been for some world-changing movements everyone promptly forgot about.
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- By Jacopo della Quercia
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- Comments
- 594
6 Impossible Escapes Using Impossibler Methods
As we never get tired of pointing out, when you combine desperation, perseverance, ingenuity and giant balls, wonderful things happen. This is proven by these tales of men who found themselves in hostile territory with no chance of escape ... and just fucking escaped anyway
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- By Tony Pilgram, Cornelius Appin, Drew Miller
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- 440
The 6 Most WTF Moments From Shakespeare Plays
Apparently, Billy Shakes was one of the most insane, violent, out of left-field wackos who ever picked up a pen.
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- By Craig Thomas
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- Comments
- 512
6 Civil War Myths Everyone Believes That Are Total B.S.
We might be going out on a limb here, but we're guessing that most of our readers aren't hardcore Civil War historians. And since VH-1 discontinued their series before they got around to the 1860s, a lot of us are walking around with Civil War misinformation firmly wired in our brains.
- Authors
- By Jacopo della Quercia
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- Comments
- 2197
6 Insane Stories of a Magician Who Helped Win WWII
How's this for a disclaimer: Much of what follows might be complete bullshit.
- Authors
- By Eric Yosomono, Dustin Koski
- Published
- Comments
- 215
If Classic Fables Actually Told the Truth [COMIC]
A stupid asshole is a poor choice to mind ones livestock.
- Authors
- By Winston Rowntree
- Published
- Comments
- 380
