Cracked Archive - History
We've worked long and hard here at Cracked to make it clear that the past was badass. All you have to do is sift through old-timey photos, and you quickly realize that people back then possessed neither sanity nor a sense of self-preservation.
- By Jacopo della Quercia
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- March 14, 2011
If you aren't currently living in a country occupied by a hostile army, you can't really imagine what it's like knowing that trying to leave home means getting your head blown off. But when people want out badly enough, they find a way. And those ways are absolutely amazing.
- By Tony Pilgram, Cornelius Appin
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- February 22, 2011
in honor of President's Day, I am thrilled to provide you with a closer look at one of the great men who served our country as King: Abraham Lincoln. Loved by many, hated by some, shot by one and feared by anyone under 6'4", Abraham Lincoln covered a divided America with a warm, bushy neck beard of protection.
- By Daniel O'Brien
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- February 18, 2011
We have it better than our ancestors in every way but one: How raging our parties are.
- By Robert Evans, Jacopo della Quercia
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- February 07, 2011
History has shown that through no fault of your own, you can be revered as some religion's immortal deity. All you need is to be in the right place at the right time.
- By Jacopo della Quercia
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- January 19, 2011
We usually think of fighter pilots as kick ass cowboys of the sky, living out our video game fantasies and handing out bitchin' nicknames all day long. But today's fighter pilots have nothing on the first of their kind -- the ones who appeared in the first world war.
- By Johnny Lepper
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- January 09, 2011
The satirically-impaired lash out against the artist, often accusing him or her of the very behavior that is being satirized. Isn't that awesome? No. It's kind of a depressing actually, but here are five of my favorite examples where the target just seemed to miss the point.
- By Gladstone
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- January 08, 2011
We all have personal failures and weaknesses, but a president will work so hard at crafting a specific public persona that we're shocked every time one gets in a sticky situation. With that in mind, here are some of the stranger facts about American presidents that almost never get mentioned in history class.
- By Ethan Lou
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- January 04, 2011
Real-life bad guys understand that dry, drawn-out political subterfuge is much cheaper and more effective than a clone army. Then, occasionally, some crackpot leaps straight off the pages into our world, with brazen, insane and often ridiculous plans for world domination that grant him comic book supervillain status.
- By Jacopo della Quercia
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- January 03, 2011
As it turns out, deus ex machina isn't strictly for fictional scenarios.
- By Jacopo della Quercia
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- December 15, 2010
I dug deeper, stayed up entire nights, and spilled a warm combination of Dr. Pepper and bravery across my keyboard.
- By Soren Bowie
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- December 13, 2010
We love us some war heroes. Unfortunately, petty people and circumstances often get in the way of honoring these individuals.
- By Eric Yosomono
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- December 12, 2010
Well, the menorah is out of storage, my refrigerator is stocked with frozen latkes, and there are dreidels festively strewn across my dining room table. Yep, all of that can mean only one thing: IT'S CHRISTMAS TIME!
- By Gladstone
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- December 04, 2010
There have been brilliant rebels who put their own world-changing ideas on the line, only to end up like Doc Brown in his alternate timeline: humiliated, ridiculed, ignored and/or straight driven to insanity.
- By Anthony Jurado, Nessa B Wilson
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- November 21, 2010
We continue our crusade to convince the world that all of the most important events in history turned on some kind of ridiculous accident.
- By Jacopo della Quercia
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- November 17, 2010
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