We won't stop until kidnappers everywhere are too worried about their victims making them look like jackasses to ever nap a kid again.
Here's the latest installment in our series 'Holy hell, people actually talk like action heroes in real life?'
When taken at face value, pictures from the olden days are either fake as hell or proof that the entire time between the Big Bang and our birth was totally messed up.
The next time someone tells you that you can't half-ass your way through life, just remember that one of those half-asses could save the world.
Some of these folks clawed their way up from mundanity simply by having immense balls.
It turns out Biggie Smalls and Jesus weren't the only people who could predict the future.
These the most famous artificially created languages around.
We like to think of big corporations as being run by shady individuals who would watch the world burn if it meant making and saving a few bucks. It turns out that we aren't too far off the mark in some cases
Things we assume were left in the distant past have a way of lingering on, decades or centuries longer than you'd have thought.
People have been noticing the deceitfulness of the world for a long time now, and history is littered with examples of people who have tried to do something about it. And they all failed.
Turns out you never know who's selling you that bottle of Evan green label.
Given humankind's penchant for handling pretty much everything it encounters with complete and utter insanity, it's no surprise that some of our death rituals have gotten a little ... inspired.
You can rest assured that many of the 'modern' problems we deal with today were around in Grandpa's time, too.
These are men who know that wars aren't won by the side with the best gear and the coolest-looking toys. Wars are won by the side with the soldiers who want it hardest.