Cracked Archive - History

The 6 Greatest Moments In Wartime Smack Talk

If only we could be like these people. If we were to suddenly find ourselves in the middle of an honest-to-God firefight, the only sick burns we'd be composing would be the ones in our underpants.


18 Ancient Jokes That Are Still Shockingly Funny Today

These jokes have held up better in hundreds of years than Seinfeld has in 20.


5 Bizarre Ways Our Ancestors Solved Major Crimes

Despite believing in witches, it turns out that the colonial American judicial system was pretty intricate.


The First Gay President: 18 Sexual Secrets Of US Presidents

Apparently Ronald Reagan saved his more unscrupulous presidential deeds for when he headed up the Screen Actors Guild.


6 Modern-Day Tech Advances (That Your Grandparents Had)

In 1965, inspired by the unique and controversial opinion that cigarettes were terrible, Herbert A. Gilbert set out to create a logical solution: the electronic cigarette.


8 Famous Political Scandals You Won't Believe Are Total Lies

It's amazing how one scream out of context can tank an entire campaign, even when you're a frontrunner.


Mormons Run Everything: 5 Things You Learn Working In Vegas

If you've had a blast in Las Vegas recently, rule number one is what happened there stays there. Rule number two is you thank a mormon.


Past Secrets The Presidential Candidates Want You To Forget

When seeking endorsements for re-election, apparently giving out pieces of 9/11 wreckage is a good idea.


6 Everyday Things Designed For Ridiculously Sexist Reasons

Sexism brought us a whole lot of bad things, but sometimes people screwed up and they accidentally brought us things that are really nice to have.


It Could Happen Here: 5 Ways Civil War Changes Modern Life

While they were busy getting degrees, raising families and starting careers, a civil war snuck up and slapped the people of Ukraine right in their pants.


26 Historical Comparisons That Will Break Your Brain

Times change. Sometimes for the better. Sometimes for the booty-er.


23 Real-Life Mad Scientists Deleted From Your History Books

When you want a woolly mammoth, the Russian mob is your first stop.


18 Terrifying Things That Were Hidden In Plain Sight

That terrifying moment when you realize your high-ranking commander is also a serial rapist and murderer.


5 Complaints About Modern Life (That Are Secretly Total BS)

The Athenians were so inundated with lawsuits that they had a special term for the sort of person who litigates if you look at them funny.