Yoga is an ancient Indian practice thought to bestow super powers on the practitioner including the ability to stay young, levitate and inspire white people to give you money.

Just The Facts

  1. Yoga teaches one to unify the mind and body, while separating the self from attachments such as dignity.
  2. Careless practice of yoga can cause painful but diffuse injuries that can only be treated by additional yoga.
  3. Side effects include hums, mantras and mild chanting.


Regardless of ones intentions going in to yoga, after some time practicing certain realizations will dawn.

An understanding of your own body far beyond what's available to anyone but a mortuary technician taking liberties after the autopsy.

Assuming you gave them up sometime after kindergarten, head stands are tremendous fun. Trouble is that seven-year-olds are short and fearless, and it can take years to build up the strength and confidence to try it as an adult. Alternatively, try getting drunk and showing off1! not responsible for drunken Yoga related injuries.