Sadly, when Debbie broke her leg during her pirouette, she had to be put down.

Mary fucked up her plié for the last time.

Man, that guy had the wierdest "last request" ever.

When the Sugarplum Fairies weren't dancing, they were the top Special Ops team in the Nutcracker Prince's army.

"I told you China shouldn't hold the Olympics."

Heston: the Musical!

Swan Lake was good.... but Duck-Hunting Lake was even better!

You know what... yeah, this will do it. This will actually get me to watch ballet. Funny all it took was some guns and a nut with a mask and a stick.

One of the more outrageous conspiracy theories surrounding the JFK assassination.

The world's only gay Stormtrooper found the transition to gymnastics teacher to be a tricky one.

Chris Hansen trains his "Lolita Assault Squad" for an upcoming episode of "To Catch a Predator."

The Elmer Fudd School of Modern Dance rehearses "Kill The Wabbit."

Somewhere, Roman Polanski has a massive erection.

SAY "STEP, STEP, PIVOT" ONE MORE TIME MOTHERFUCKER!

Letting Quentin Tarantino choreograph the National Ballet's latest piece seemed like a good idea at the time...