Converse Trainers. When you absolutely positively have to kill every mother fucker in the room, accept no substitute.

Some bars have peanut shells all over the floor. Then there are the tougher bars...

It was everyone's worst fear: The emo kids... they were indesctructible...

This is why we have flyswatters.

After the fourth round it became pretty clear that Ernest's suicide attempt was actually a cry for help.

Just another Texas wedding. Or 4th of July. Or Birthday party. Or cook-out...

Yeah, Neo, that's very cool. But you're still a douchebag.

Michael J. Fox had been at target practice all afternoon, but he refused to call it a day until he hit the bullseye.

A scene from Home Alone 4.

Well, that concludes our tour. So, when do think your child will be joining our school? Wait! Where are you going?

Fuckin' hipster Iraqi kids what with their rolled up cuffs and whatnot.

"Whoops, sorry about that. OK, now the safety's on."

Lord of the Flys would have been a much shorter book in 2008.

Anyone else think cuffs are gay?..... Didn't think so!

This is what happens when Quentin Tarantino and Robert Rodriguez team up to make a sneaker commercial. Awesome, but damned if it makes any sense Catch it... at the Grindshoe!