Craptions Classics February 13, 2008

Attaining sperm from the near-extinct Barbershop Dolphin was difficult work, but that's why Steve made the big bucks.

PaulTMD

Other Craptions

Dewey was given the great honor of adjusting the bendy straws for our giant alien overlords.

LardLad

Man, it was rough getting a television signal in the days before cable...

flyingmnky

You know, those guys over at Anonymous might just have a point about Scientology...

flyingmnky

Ironically, after he pulled it, Bobby found himself stuck on the Stop The World I Want To Get Off switch...

flyingmnky

While most people might use a banana, a pepper grinder or maybe a beer bottle to make lude and suggestive gesticulations, Chris had to search high and low for objects that gave a more accurate indication.

MarchoMan

If I can just pull this giant lever then Lost will finally be over.

Nebulon

Taking a run at it, William jumped towards the pole. "Dammit," said WIlliam, "It missed my anus yet AGIAN!"

Shmichael

Testing for the revised voting system in the upcoming election held very little promise.

KermitChambers

As it turns out, no, you cannot stop a train with your nuts.

planB

Oh, David Blaine, is there nothing you won't do?

Crenshaw

The rare wild candy cane is much larger and more aggressive than its domestic cousin.

jic

Jack be nimble Jack be quick Jack jump over the...OH FUCK.

zephyr949

Overcome with grief about the naughty list, Santa instructed his dim-whitted elf, Herby, to aim the "Candy Cannon" towards Los Angeles.

TillyKGB

Tommy was on the cusp of proving time travel was INDEED possible. Yes, he would show them all!

BubbaLove
Choosing to "Like" Cracked has no side effects, so what's the worst that could happen?

The Weekly Hit List

Sit back... Relax... We'll do all the work.
Get a weekly update on the best at Cracked. Subscribe now!