Craptions Classics January 03, 2008

Cracked unveils its revolutionary "Dick Joke Machine"

imthe_d

Other Craptions

Dave liked to hide behind the machine and moan as people reached for their sodas.

kingsteve14

SURGEON GENERAL'S WARNING: penis.

mmpl

You should see the back of the machine...

frrrrrrunkis

After inserting the money and buying the item, Bob couldn't decide whether or not he should reach in and get it.

LetItBe

"Damn you, Superman!" shouted Aerosmith guitarist Joe Perry. "I will break free from this prison!"

TheGreenSaga

One day our grandchildren will look back and be amazed at how primitive sex robots used to be.

AdjectiveNoun

Hasslehofmania in Germany peaked with the "Grab my crotch for a quarter" machines.

flyingmnky

After years of imprisonment with no hope of release, General Zod decides to learn a musical instrument.

AndyDyslexia

It has long been suspected that Red Bull is just canned piss.

cateraction

Dude... In Japan, you can get anything out of a machine!!!

BubbaLove

Margaret didn't know why the sperm bank would need an ATM in the first place, but this was ridiculous

cigjonser

"Ya see? It's Guitar Hero, but in a CAN!"

WhiteMike

Brett Michaels new line of mobile glory holes, cumming to a reststop near you.

frrrrrrunkis
Choosing to "Like" Cracked has no side effects, so what's the worst that could happen?

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