Hey Karl, your bald eagle trap worked! Should we rape them first, or just make them watch us eat their babies?

It was Roger's Birthday and he had spent days trying to figure out what his present could be!

the spider car tries to use bald eagles to lure old people to their doom, sadly...it fails

Previous unknown to biologists worldwide, the American bald eagle was recently discovered to be the premiere practical joker of the animal kingdom.

"The car is on your left side", Theo smiled, while turning Dan towards the automobile. He was sure his shock absorbing wrapping and eagle eye system would enable the blind to drive again. He figured he could make millions

The spider car tries to use bald eagles to lure old people to their doom...sadly it fails.

"Dave, next time you do that to my car im gonna rape you in it"

Rove, determined to engineer a Democratic sex scandal. By any means necessary.

"I can't believe we're doing this Roger; imagine what Bob is going to think when he sees the state of his car!" "Yeah, next time he better remember that when you kill the joe, you make some mo'!"

HEY FUCKWADS: STOP SUBMITTING SHIT A MILLION TIMES.

No seriously Karl, please tell me thats a mini snickers bar in your pocket.

"If that shit isnt off in 5 minutes I drop this media smile and you can consider yourself skull fucked..."

Your mom tried to fight back so I had to hold her like this

"You know what the best part of this joke is? I locked your dog in there."

Turdblossom prepares his float for the Republican Gay Pride parade.