Damn, old cell phones used to be huge.

The sight of a turkey walking eastward on Maple Street made the meaning of Nostradamus' most recently discovered quatrain all too clear.

Cock Tease!

Q: Why did the turkey try to cross the road? A: Martha Stewart is walking the down the street.

" Kiss the wings, bitch," Randy the Bad-ass Turkey ordered to Katie.

"Heel to toe, heel to toe. Work the runway, and TURN!"

"Seriously Cracked...what the hell is going on with this multiple picture nonsense?" thought the sad lonely geek whose only joy in life was ripping on Cracked.

at the sight of the waddle, ana felt the warmth spread. the lurid pink hue and boastful strutting punched through her bourgeois veneer - registering in her loins with a palpable moistness.

Coming Soon To a Theater Near You From the people who brought you Die Hard, Die Harder and Die Hard With A Vengeance comes: FRY HARD WITH A VENGEANCE This turkey isn't going down without a fight!

Fashion keeps getting more and more ridiculous.

Michael Jackson's complete makover was a success. Now he was finally ready to hit on an actual woman... any woman.

Nothing much has changed in the future... Oh. Right. The Giant Turkeys you say??? LOOONG story.

PETA finally achieved their greatest success, the ending of segregation and the start of a new era of democracy.

Q: Why did the turkey cross the road? A: Oh shit, Martha Stewart with a Thanksgiving recipe.

Q: Why did the turkey cross the road? A: Shit, Martha Stewart with a Thanksgiving recipe.