What's better than diet Coke and Mentos? Diet Coke and Mentos in a boa constrictor.

"Okay, Harry. This is clever and all. But why do we need to sneak a beer bong onto the plane?"

Elderly boas can only eat liquid pig.

When Chang said he had to "drain the serpent" he meant it literally.

First you teach the snake not to bite by giving it an electric shock every time it bites the tube, then you put your cock in.

Low gas prices? Better sssssssstock up!

"These days children are playing video games and using mobile phones. They don't just want any old regular balloon..."

"Quick, fill my snake up! I have to ride it all the way to Xingmatsu!"

Any idiot can extract snake venom. It takes a genius to extract snake Play-Doh.

"Oh, we have ways of making you talk..."

"Hiiiiissssss."

Preheat oven to 350. Squeeze in ricotta with a pastry filler. Lightly brush with oil and bake for 40-45 minutes. Serves 4.

"Snake like Garden"
- Ancient chinese proverb

"To be a fool is to take a proverb literally"
- Oscar Wilde

Wong,
This is how you make the secret sauce

The'Endangered Species Captive Breeding Centre' desparately needs additional funds to train volunteers in methods of artificial insemination.

Just keep trying, I need those keys back.