That's the strangest fucking hat I've ever seen.

"CNN is on the spot as Michael Jackson is coming out of the hospital with yet another minor surg-- sweet jesus."

Thankfully he isn't showing us her necklace.

"Be still, my pet, the hour is not yet nigh"

"Oh, I'm sorry - you haven't met my wife yet, have you?"

Quaid....Start the Reactor....

Since he had to go door to door explaining to his neighborsw about his previous pedophilia charges he decided to do it in a kid friendly way.

Jerry's belly was a stunt double for porn stars who didn't do money shots.

20 beers and one massive gut later, Jim shouted "I DONT NEED YOU GUYS, I CAN MAKE MY OWN FRIENDS".

Do these lips make me look fat?

I would totally fuck her nose

"This is the closest I've ever been to a chick in my whole life!"

Hey, my face is DOWN here.

Mom, dad. This is Linda.

"We have become ONE!"