"Ok kids, our field trip this year will be... the Republican-making factory! Yay!"

Soon even people were Made In China

First contact with the Aliens was enough to convince everyone involved that it wasn't worth the effort.

Step 1: Open your bag
Step 2: Put Dick Clark in your bag

Evolution as told by Scientology

Toy makers were baffled to discover that their lastest product, "Mr. Lobbyist and Friends," had flopped. The focus groups had been so positive.

KKK tried a few other robes and races before settling for opaque and blacks

"They said I couldn't do it..." Mike lauged to himself as he sealed Frank Sinatra's air-tight bag. He had completed his collection of mummified original Rat Pack members.

Seeing his greatest enemies frozen and neatly wrapped made the giant wooden seal so happy that he lied down on his back and clapped.

I don't like the looks of this one. How do I know they are fresh?

The Ecuadorian culture strangely worshiped, and made statues of, pale looking pedophiles.

Real senators aren't born, they're assembled.

Liberal Douce Bags march to the White House.

"Body condoms – When safe sex just isn't safe enough".

Their Koolaid supply exhausted, the cult members decided to stage a mass suicide using plastic bags instead