"Fight and slay the Infidels wherever ye find them, and seize them, beleaguer them, and take from them their drinks and smash them upon the ground, unless they be Pepsi, which is a beverage most pleasing to Allah." –Surah 9:5

Just as he was driving through the worst part of town, the engine died. Glancing around nervously, the Balrog popped the hood and got out of the car to have a look.

Unable to find their mother amongst the wreckage, Akmed took the bottles home and raised them as his own.

Out of grenades and pinned down by enemy fire, Abdul remembers the Mentos-and-Pepsi trick he'd seen on YouTube.

The Cola War is getting out of hand.

It's a good thing I have an erection to help me carry this case, because I only have one arm.

Having run out of explosives, the suicide bombers were forced to improvise.

The all-new Pepsi Molotov® was an instant success in an otherwise dismal year for the Iraqi beverage industry.

Neither rain,nor sleet, nor hail, nor sectarian violence shall keep the PEPSI man from his duties.

Ahmad says: "When I took the Pepsi soda delivery job, they said it had 'obstacles and opportunity', but this is absolute bullshit!"

"HEY! No, what the hell are you doing!?" screamed the Pepsi bottles in the crate, "You can't just LEAVE them here! They're bleeding man!"

Generation neXt

Yes, in case of a bombardment and destruction of your town, it is best not to secure your valuable possessions or family, but to effin' save your Pepsi collection. Hell, those bottle deposits will replace the loss of life, right?

Fuck my wife and kids, all i want is my soda