The last thing Michael Jackson will ever see

Tommy was not going into timeout, and he fucking meant it.

"The South will rise again," they said. And it did. But after it got bored of that, the South went to Mikey's house to play Madden 2007.

Bobby wore his lucky medal. It had saved his father from fake gun noises during the kindergarden wars of '88 and he was sure it would save him too.

McDonald's decision to stop giving toys with their Happy Meals would be something they would regret.

FOR GLORY! FOR HONOR! FOR AFTERNOON SNACKS WITH JUICE!

perhaps the south was taking the term 'infantry' a little TOO literally

...But the Borg quickly adapted to BANG BANG noises.

The Little Rascals totally thought they were ready to take on the forces of Mordor. They were wrong.

Thomas Edison's secret weapon, the 'Rejuvenation Ray', had a devastating effect on enemy forces at Gettysburg. By the end of the day, nearly all of these veteran Confederate soldiers had been spanked and sent to bed early.

Just another day in the Young Republicans Club.

White kids finally got sick of pretending to like rap music.

With a demonic gleam in his eyes, the son of Satan mobilized his army...

This year we will be replacing Math with Rebellion: Theory and Practice.

Billy found the bag of white powder in his father's wardrobe, and, soon after, shared it with the rest of the neighborhood kids.