"I have many skeletons in my closet, but these are my favorite."

Skeletor's bachelor party was AWESOME.

Can you describe the dance troupe that ate your baby?

Trust me, when the cover charge is only 2 pesos at a Tijuana strip club, you want them to keep the masks on.

If necrophilia is still wrong, I don't want to be right.

"No Carol, I don't give a damn how good their personalities are."

Girls Night Out of the Living Dead

Alright, who's the wise guy who opened the Ark of the Covenant?

"Bob, the one on the left just gave me her eye." "You mean she gave you the eye, don't you Mike?" "Um, no. Look it's a blue one."

What happens in Eternia, stays in Eternia.

Why do all of my sex dreams turn horrifying?

If you can't get rid of the skeletons in your closet, you might as well teach them to belly dance.

Three Whores of the Apocalypse. Famine was late for practice and they kicked her out of the group.

They can't believe they got college credit for this either.

In the end, the lapdance would cost $20, plus one virgin soul, which unfortunately was not hard to come by.