Because synchronized swimming is for pussies.

On second thought, let's NOT go to Detroit... it is a silly place...

An unforeseen consequence of the US government taking over GM: all the cars are now leaning to the left.

Suuure, they do it on a track, it's called a sport. I do it drunk on the highway and it's called a "felony".

"Why you should never cut Magneto off on the interstate..."

Disqualified contestants from 'The Biggest Loser' leave the parking lot.

"The Fast and The Furious 18: We've Been Out of Ideas For Awhile Now"

Now we're just fucking with our insurance company

Because in urban areas, they don't have cows to tip.

Your move, Geico.

"Autobots- transform and stop fucking around...!"

The new Prius is aimed at the Middle Eastern market- on any sign of trouble, it automatically transforms into a barricade.

Steve can you just admit you don't know how to balance tires.

The only known preventative measure against a trucker tan

You guys do realize you can adjust the side mirrors from the inside, right?