Those crazy gangsters and their turf wars.
"You fed your Chia Pets after midnight, didn't you? You idiot! You've doomed us all!"
"As a vegetarian and a pervert, I'd eat that."
Why did the grass cross the road? Because the chicken was greener on the other side! Wait... I fucked that up.
With global warming drying out their marsh lands, the Swap Things have been forced to migrate into urban areas.
Some species of crabgrass are extremely aggressive and nearly impossible to stop.
"Well, we were going to tar and feather them. But we only had maple syrup and lawn clippings. So we made do."
You know what I hate most about mowing the lawn? The screams.
Kate Moss' brother, Peat.
Guys- the trick is to choose the right camouflage for the right place.
"ALL YOUR FERTILIZER ARE BELONG TO US!!"
Scott's body lotion cures dry itchy skin, but there are a few side effects.
Miracle-Gro addicts are easy to spot.
"Before the uprising we all took Crab Grass for granted...they were just biding their time..."
I'm lichen this.