Not what I meant when I said we should drink a whole case tonight.
Somewhere, a genie is growing very impatient with baggage claim.
"Sure, you drank it all, but to be a real man, you have to eat the suitcase."
We were only going to send a message, but of course the wife had to pack her make-up, a hair-dryer, shampoo, her nice shoes, 3 pairs of sunglasses, a back-up purse, perfume...
The new TSA packing guidelines are ridiculous...!
Coincidentally, the chest inside is where he keeps all of his bottles.
With a sinking sensation, John realized where he'd left his keys.
The crowd roared at David Blaineâ€™s latest feat, where he locked up Carrot Top in the comic's own prop trunk and then magically sealed it in a glass bottle.
Bottle of red, bottle of white...it all depends upon your Samsonite.
They are making it harder and harder to get into Narnia.
â€œFuck, you leave your bag unattended for 1 minute these days and they quarantine it.â€
Because a fanny pack in a bottle just makes you look like another tourist.
â€œItâ€™s just my wifeâ€™s creative way of sending me the message that she knows about my mistress and that sheâ€™s kicking me out of the house.â€
Yes, I know you said you had a lot of weird baggage, but I thought you were referring to childhood memories. So no, I don't have a handcart.