Michael Bay Presents: Fishing

The first baptism in the Mississippi River after the BP oil spill did not go well.

Eye Witness Testimony: "Everything was fine until the Pop-Rocks truck lost traction and collided with the Coca-Cola Van..."

And the producers finally found a season ending to Jersey Shore that pleased everyone: just nuking the damn house.

Rammstein don't even bother playing music any more.

Everyone was quite surprised. Well...we assume they were surprised. Without eyebrows, it was tough to tell.

"You know what I really hate? Giant, unstoppable, all-devouring hellfires. Wait a second... There's one right behind me, isn't there?"

"Dude, I think they're just pumping KISS through the PA system and using a ton of pyrotechnics to cover up the fact that the band's not really here."

So he actually said "termite" when I thought he said "thermite" haha! Anyway, we put out heads together and started this exterminator business

Sparklers were always kinda lame when I was a kid, but somehow, Uncle Jake made them work better.

"Safety first everyone! Here are some straw hats."

"Ok, that beats Rock."

And Dave learned the hard way never to eat Pasta and Anti-pasta the same night.

Okay god a burning bush is one thing but this is just showing off.

Arson: You're doing it, right?