After every performance, various parts of Lady Gaga must be replaced.

"WHOA!! Now stop that. That's the kind of shit that got us fired from Macy's in the first place!"

You. Complete. Me.... No, that's a request.

After my 6th birthday, my dad wasn't allowed to buy the pinatas anymore.

"Quick, touch them up and put the wigs back on, Jersey Shore doesn't make itself!"

So I've basically counted up and added all parts involved. This pretty much qualifies as the first ever two-and-one-half-some.

Phil couldn't afford a fancy Valentine's day gift. He was broke.

Having no arms and no hair is no problem when it comes to getting a man, so long as you still know how to use your fabulous tits.

Awwww...He went to Jared!

Love is a Many Splintered Thing

“Duct tape! We need much more duct tape!”

VH1 Behind the Commercials: The Fall of the Old Navy Mannequins

They're not threatening... they're totally unarmed! (I am SO sorry)

“Tearing my arms off and pinching my nipples is fine, but no kissing on the lips.”

Breaking up IS hard to do...