"Uh..Sorry New Jersey..We took a vote and well...we just can't take it anymore.."

And just like that, Todd's Boy Scout troop had become a nuclear power.

Gentlemen, we've done it. We've weaponized the dick joke.

When it didn't launch, no one wanted to admit it was due to Projectile Dysfunction.

In Israel, they would be "terrorists"...but in the South, they're Hobbyists.

Apparently, the US Army has adopted corporate America's practice of Casual Fridays

I'm hungry - I'm just gonna press this big red button that says "lunch"

Your move, Wiley Coyote, your move.

...and somewhere, Dick Cheney is touching himself.

That's a humdinger of a resignation letter, Bob

The Small Penis Support Group on their weekly field-trip.

The Alabama/Mississippi border war is escalating. The rest of the country looks forward to their mutual annihilation.

This is gonna be the best 4th of July ev--

This explains all the dead birds in Arkansas.

Most of General Awesome's BBQs ended in the destruction of a foreign country.