Janie... you should leave him... the guy's a parasite...

Your move, Dr. House!

"Everyone at the party knew Jenny had a sketchy sexual history..."

Her Match.com ad said she had an infectious personality.

"Soon," thought Grebulon, "The human males will fall for my lure."

Finally, someone answered my requests for giant mitochondrial porn.

Nuva-Ring isn't for everyone. Ask your doctor.

You know what they say...once you go protozoa, you'll always be back for mo-a.

"I asked him to win me the teddy bear. My boyfriend's an asshole."

No more jumbo shrimp for me, they go right to my hips.

"Excuse me, miss? Your villi are showing."

"Look! Jean's back from Chernobyl!"

Call that a balloon animal? This is a balloon animal...

Apparently, Susan is in heat again...

You idiot... I wanted an orgasm... not an organism