Becky, don't break up with me. I can change for you.

its ok babe. i brought antivirus.

Lifetime should never have been given rights to shoot a Transformers movie.

He can turn into a truck. She can turn into a psychotic bitch.

"I think you misunderstood my ad, Im interested in a TRANSGENDER"

Oh yeah? Well, you're no Megan Fox!

"101001100011010101010100011100." - "Oh, you're such a sweet talker."

Due to a freak computer glitch, Match.com was merged with Carfax...

No honey, that boat isn't your nemesis. Will you just relax while we're on vacation!

Sandra could no longer hide the reason she was coming to work with rust around her lips.

Who cares?! I met my boyfriend online at "Robot_Boyfriend_Finder.com"

Soundwave was devastated when she left him for an Autobot that could play MP3s.

9 months later Chuck Norris was born

"Frank, you're just not the Ford Focus I fell in love with anymore."

Some girls will go to great lengths to piss off their fathers.