Contrary to what history books tell us, Jefferson was in fact, a little teapot, short and stout.

Danger, George Washington, Danger!

*sigh* "Welcome to Liberty Burger, where every day we declare outrageous flavor. Would you like to add a delicious Dolly Madison cupcake to your order? Please pull up to the second window..."

"I prefer my memorials brown, just like my women."

It's obscured by the bush, but underneath "Sowing useful truths" it says, "...and plowing lots of slaves."

The other arm is punching aesthetics in the face.

Thomas Jefferson: Great President. Terrible scarecrow.

Why, what does your mailbox look like?

After the other founding fathers died out, "Steam-Jefferson" wandered the countryside, fighting other steambots, spouting "wisdom" at white people, and trying to have sex with every black person he found.

If you insert a 2 dollar bill it dances.

Thomas Jefferson Starship

When memorializing a president in bronze, the Star Wars font is always a good lettering choice.

Mount Rustmore

Jefferson: The Man, The Mailbox...

Less well-known was Jefferson's Declaration of Incoherence.