All of the statues in New Orleans have these now...

The black guy does a double take, noticing that the woman's purse only has a spaghetti strap.

The caption on the statue says,"Women and children my ASS!"

No wonder he can't swim. He's plastered!

I think the life vest is there to cover up the fact that he's grabbing his crotch with his left hand.

Safety NEVER takes a vacation

Hundreds of people drowned at the pool before anyone realized the lifeguard was made of stone.

In the summer, they put another orange safety vest on him and make him clean up the park.

If you think helmet laws suck, life jacket laws are even worse.

A lot of good trhis life jacket is going to do. I'm made of fucking stone!

The vest distracts from the fact that the statue has his pants tucked into his boots.....

"It says: Please vote for my Craption because I couldn't think of anything funny to write!"

"here lies leif jeckat"

After making the sculpture more well endowed than humanly possible, the city fathers decided to cover it up with the vest, lest it attract gays to gather and meet.

Monument to Joshua Pickler, the first man to drown in a bathtub.