Statuatory rape

Now THIS is Sparta.

In ancient times, the game of Twister was a bloodsport.

My safety word is Agamemnon

"The sign says the statue is made of marble, but I clearly see wood."

Ahhh.. the good old days.

This led later to the invention of baseball.

The only club that women don't want to go to.

THIS...IS...SAN FRANCISCO!

The most awkward part? They had to hold that pose for 9 hours to get sculpted.

Later, they noticed the black man across the river, and decided to gang up on him.

In ancient Greece, chess pawns were slightly more badass.

The ear is the wrong part of the body you want to stick that in...

"It's not gay if I kill him right after, right?"

If it's a hole in a body, the Greeks have made a statue with somebody fucking it. For this one it's ears.