No, Mom. She turned me down. I know you want grandkids, Mom, jeez.

Never EVER EVER Land

"Hi dad? Remember how you said I could get laid if girls thought I was cute? Well fuck you!"

Winnie the Poohdophile

Hint: she's not the only fairy in the group.

He's got wood, but it's nowhere near 100 acres.

Hi Daniel, this is Regis Philbin from Who Wants to be a Millionaire. Here's your question. Where is the G-Spot?

"Christopher Robin... *sniff*... Peter's cockblockin' me again."

She's not letting him anywhere near her honey pot.

You know you've worn a stupid costume when Peter Pan tells you to grow up.

"We don't yet know the winner of this Scavenger Hunt, but we've identified a bunch of the losers."

Peter would so hate fuck Tinkerbell if Pooh Bear would just go away.

Where's Al Gore?! I found ManBearPig!!

Welcome to Virgin-ia.

T-mobile's network isn't nearly as big as Verizon's, but it's a lot more whimsical.