Tom Cruise is the only one allowed to speak directly with L. Ron Hubbard.

"Cunninglus Hero" is now available in an arcade near you!

20 minutes after pot is legalized.

WHY THE FUCK DIDN'T I TAKE THE BLUE PILL?!

Now you can sample before making withdrawls at the Sperm Bank too.

In Obama's America, you don't vote in the booths -- your opinions are sucked out of you.

Stephen Hawking's home gym

Microsoft announces the new XBong360!

The Christopher Reeve experience.

OH! It's supposed to go on your mouth! No wonder they kicked me out...

If this doesn't whiten my teeth and make me better at oral sex, i don't know what will.

Now Chris would NEVER have to leave his World of Warcraft game.

In California, they have Oral Sex Training Booths right there in the mall!

Does Cracked have a hidden camera in my office?

New from Apple, iDentist.