[Transcript: iPhone Audio Recording #2]: 7 p.m. Food is an incidental irritation. Considering their convenience and taste, I plan to order MREs bulk upon transitioning back into the human world. The first hour of wearing my new face took some adjustment but was equalized by acquiring a flamethrower to ward off the specimen until the company would be able to properly contain it. Congruently, I have also contained my cat in a laundry basket until I can decide how to proceed with proper grooming and possible annihilation.
[Transcript: iPhone Audio Recording #3]: 10 p.m. Unable to contain the menace, it was eliminated by my hand. Correction: I eliminated the alien; the cat managed to escape after tricking me into granting 30 minutes of dedicated petting time, only to squirm away when I attempted to possess a bag of Whisker Lickin's inside of my desk drawer. Strangely, the creature's expulsion from the game did not mark the end. Why? It does not seem fitting for my character to survive once her task is completed. The story turned into evasion and eradication of the Working Joes, which I found displeasing. My first instinct was to approach these synthetic divinities as a servant, but, unfortunately, this resulted in having my neck snapped. Next, I attempted to casually walk next to them like I was supposed to be there. Unfortunately, this resulted in having my neck snapped. Killing civilians resulted in my termination from the game. I don't understand. The Joes are clearly the primary beings aboard this ship. They feel no fear and had immunity from the now-vanquished villain. They were Gods among the cowering flesh. [long pause] What must I do to become one of them? Must I become the dragon serpent?
It was midnight, and for the first time, I stepped out of my fright shroud and looked in the mirror.
In that moment, I realized that regardless of the rolling credits on my TV, the game had won.
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