"Protesters Are There To Create Chaos"
This is sort of a reiteration of the last point, but I think it's really important.
Let's think about this mathematically. They say "hell hath no fury like a woman scorned," and there were 750,000 people in Los Angeles last Saturday. I'd say about 75% of them were women, which means that's 562,500 scorned women. Following that logic, downtown LA was subject to 562,500 times the fury of hell, or 562.5 kilofuries. Wait -- I forgot to factor in that the scorn of a woman is worse than anything hell has at its disposal. That proverb is not as useful as I hoped it would be. I guess we'll have to estimate that it's just a boatload of fury, right?
Avert your eyes, for this fury is too grotesque.
And yet I attended and somehow I survived. Not due to my masculine resilience, but because the fury of all these "scorned women" seemed to mostly manifest itself in supporting each other, inspiring each other, and sharing surprisingly clever pop-culture references.
"Hey!" I shouted, "want a job?"
Then I remembered that I'm not important enough to make those decisions ever since I tried to hire my drug dealer as my personal assistant.