This piece was written by the Cracked Store to tell you about products that are being sold there.
Growing up means trading in your toys and games for 401-ks and health insurance premiums. It's a tough transition, but it's the only way to finally achieve the coveted title of "adult person." Of course, only the truly mature understand that after adulthood comes the second childhood. It's that phase of your life in which you go out and acquire all the cool gadgets that you couldn't afford as a tiny child. Which gadgets, you ask? Why ...
Anybody old enough to have their own credit card probably didn't have 3D printing technology as a child. Correct that injustice for yourself (or your children, if you've spawned some) with the Toybox 3D Printer, which allows you to create your own designs and upload them without any adult interference at all.
Normally $469, grab yours in the Cracked Shop for just $314.99.
Ever look at your cellphone and think, "Why can't I prop this up with the assistance of a scary claw that looks like something out of Neon Genesis Evangelion?" If so, the MyGEKOgear MagiClaw is your dream come true, since it holds your phone, grips any surface anywhere, and looks like the gadgetry of a mad scientist hellbent on world domination.
Normally $49.99, you can grab yours in the Cracked Shop for a paltry $39.99.
Most stands aren't classy enough to hold your iPhone X with panache, but this is where the StandONE separates itself. It has the strength, nay, the grace to hold your iPhone while looking absolutely dope.
Normally $29, you can get yours in the Cracked Shop for just $22.99.
Earbuds are great for working out and traveling, but when you want to chill for the night and really sink into your music, then nothing beats over-ear headphones, in both sound quality and price. Sinji Bluetooth Headphones are designed for maximum price-friendliness and also sound quality.
Normally $79.95, you can pick yours up in the Cracked Shop for just $25.99.
Charging should be portable, but unfortunately, you can't carry around an entire house with a working electrical system and full outlets in your pocket (not without Pym Particles, at least). What you can do, however, is use the QiStone2 to charge your devices on the go. The QiStone2 carries enough energy to top off your device a few times over, and uses fast-charging with USB-C ports to make sure you don't have to wait. (Hank Pym wishes he thought of this first.)
Normally $79.99, you can get yours in the Cracked Shop for just $59.99.
You can think of the xFyro ARIA earbuds as tiny gremlins screaming beautiful music directly into your brain. Or you can think of them simply as state-of-the-art listening devices. Either way, they give you a flawless sound for eight hours on one charge, plus an additional 24 hours with the included charging case.
Normally $250, you can get them in the Cracked Shop for just $99.
Did you know some TV channels are just floating around the air, waiting to be watched for free? The Rveal Digital Indoor HDTV Antenna can let you unlock them with no monthly fees, no cables, and no secret costs. Now you can watch TV without being lorded over by the whims of subscription services. (We all know Netflix is going to eventually ask for blood sacrifice to use their app.)
Normally $29, you can get yours in the Cracked Shop for $19.99.
Can you imagine exploring the internet, but instead of going in unprotected, you're flanked by the digital equivalent of a pack of angry direwolves? The Gryphon router keeps hackers and malicious programs at bay by standing guard over your wireless router and barking at them whenever they get too close.
Not only is the normal $257 price reduced to $199, but the normal 12 free months of protection has been expanded to 18. Grab your Gryphon in the Cracked Shop now.
There's nothing worse for a phone's battery than overcharging it (Except for maybe taking it out and throwing it in a river.) The Charby Sense Charging Cable prevents this decay by monitoring your device's charge and automatically cutting off when the battery is full. It then uses that same technology to increase charging speeds.
Normally $39, you can get yours in the Cracked Shop for $28.
You can REALLY recreate your childhood with educational grown-up toys. These DIY Block Drones Are Proof Learning Can Be Fun.
Things could always be much, much worse.
The cops will come swooping in the seconds the credits roll.
You've probably never heard of it.