The word "bae" had a bread stick stabbed through his heart when the Olive Garden's Twitter page used it so often that the account seemed like it was run by an AI that went bonkers after a lab assistant spilled marinara on an iPhone playing Beyonce's Lemonade.
There are four sentences. Not one of them makes sense on its own. When combined, they form madness.
Nothing kills internet trends faster than the greedy inauthentic touch of corporate America. And that greed may be the only thing that can keep America safe from the spread of the fake news that threatens to erode trust in our journalistic institutions.
This isn't the "fake news" label Donald Trump uses to delegitimize anything that report facts proving he's bigly full of shit. Fake news is a very real problem in which people with no ethical principles fan-fiction current events to dupe every gullible racist uncle and dimwitted high school acquaintance on Facebook feeds across the globe, hoping they spread it far and wide so they can make a fortune. It's easy and you can do it from home. It's a burgeoning industry.