After espying this whimsy-baited fracture machine, the morning's plans suddenly took shape. The man's friends dared him to tie himself to the carousel with packing tape (which they had presumably brought along because they were planning on killing him anyway) while they spun the carousel around as fast as they could. The man, honor bound to accept this challenge either by sheer boredom or because it was issued on a Sunday morning in Germany (a phrase here meaning "he was almost certainly drunk"), agreed, and he was lashed to a giant metal child's toy wrought from exceedingly low production standards with tape generally used to keep cardboard boxes from spilling Garfield books all over the floor.
The situation quickly escalated, as dares tend to do, and the man's friends decided that the best way to up the stakes and maximize everyone's enjoyment would be to spin the carousel using the car they'd driven to the playground. The man either agreed with them or was already choking on too much vomit to form a coherent objection, so they tied the car to the carousel and drove off as fast as they could, sending their friend into a gravity-negating spin typically reserved for astronaut training.
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"... one giant leap for dumbass kind."
Predictably, the tape came loose, and the man was thrown from the carousel like Super Dave Osborne in a carnival explosion. He was killed more or less immediately, and his friends were treated at the hospital for shock before being charged with involuntary manslaughter. We assume that this means he "won" the dare, although we hasten to point out that he would've been awarded the exact same amount of nothing for "losing," with the added bonus of getting to still be alive.
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