Russian Trolls Used Satan Arm Wrestling Jesus As Propaganda

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I don't want to undermine how insidious this Russian-government funded troll campaign was. It was designed to divide the voting population along arbitrary lines such as race, gender, sexuality, and religion. It reached over a hundred million people, and could have had an impact on the election. It's a big deal.

But then again, if you asked me to trade in the sanctity of our democracy to see Jesus arm-wrestle Satan, I would. I mean, look at this masterpiece:

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Ignore the painfully blatant propaganda for a minute. Look at the beautiful composition of this photo. You can see the strife in Satan's face as he tries to keep his grip on Jesus's perfect hand and buff arms. His palm is getting sweaty. Is it because of the competition, or the intensity of Jesus's unbroken eye-contact? Jesus himself is a work of art here. His beard and hair reads less like the Son of God, and more like Hank who sells bootleg fireworks and volunteers at the local demolition derby. He looks like how Mac would portray himself as Jesus in It's Always Sunny.

Even the text here is masterful. "Hillary is a Satan." This is a good way to instill religious fear. She's not the Satan, she's a Satan, one of many Satans who want to arm-wrestle us into oblivion. But not if we press "like" enough! Satan hates it when we press "like!" It's kryptonite to Satan!

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What could possibly top buff Satan fighting demolition derby Jesus? How about an absolutely swole Bernie:

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I'm honestly not sure what this Russian propaganda is meant to accomplish. Is it trying to instill homophobia by convincing people that "the gays" only want to vote for Bernie because he's hot? Is it trying to convince gay people to vote for Bernie because he's hot? Is it just some fan art that got slipped in during a hectic day at the troll factory? We may never know, but we do know that if our democracy is going to crumble, at least we got a Simpsons-colored buff Bernie with red nipples out of the deal.

For more check out What Stupid Conspiracy Theory Is Out There Now? (10/28/2017) and What Stupid Thing Is Trending Now? (10/28/2017).

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