Life in the Slow Lane for Hanks? Hollywood superstar Tom Hanks almost missed the LA premiere of The Golden Compass last night, blaming traffic conditions. Some had speculated that the star of Forrest Gump and The Green Mile might not make it to the event, but Hanks ultimately showed. "Sorry, I was stuck in traffic," Hanks told reporters as fans looked on from behind the velvet rope. Hanks was accompanied to the event by his wife Rita Wilson.But lately, it seems there's a new Starpulse in town. They're trying to feature more in-depth articles, and, bless their hearts, the results are adorable. No, wait. Not adorable. I mean maddeningly inept. Like this latest gem: a feature they like to call
Things could always be much, much worse.
The cops will come swooping in the seconds the credits roll.
You've probably never heard of it.