Boyfriend Trouble For Goldie's Spawn

Kate Hudson ---famous for her supporting role in Almost Famous and virtually nothing else--- has broken up with her boyfriend Dax Shepard.

Suffice to say I'm pretty stunned. It's always a difficult time when an actress I barely care about dumps an actor I've hardly heard of:

Friends claim the actress wants to spend more time concentrating on her three-year-old son Ryder and isn't interested in a serious romance. A friend of actor Shepard tells In Touch Weekly magazine, "Dax is devastated over losing Kate. He will do anything to win her back."

So it seems Kate's on the market and she's looking for a decidedly un-serious relationship. For those of you still having Penny Lane-inspired wet dreams, here's your chance! But are you Kate Hudson material? I've put together this chart itemizing Kate's past relationships to help you, the loyal Cracked blog reader, decide:

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Kate's Men	Chris Robinson	Owen Wilson	Dax Shephard
Intelligence	Handful of remaining brain cells contain information only on bong construction.	Fairly intelligent, but excels at appearing kind-heartedly stupid	Probably the smartest person who hasnât changed his name from Dax
Drug Use	Smells like a Rastafarianâs dreadlock dipped in a pool of hemp oil contained within a Deadhead's armpit	Apparently that monkey on his back wasn't Ben Stiller	IMDB lists âsnowboardingâ in his bio so Iâm guessing
Looks	As ugly as homemade sin	Unconventionally handsome	See above.
Deals With Break-ups By	Becoming progressively less famous and dating what appears to be my pre-K teacher from the late 70's.	Attempting suicide	Whining to chatty friends who blab to Starpulse.com