CNN Waaaay Too Excited About a Teen ‘Sex in the City’ (or Speaking of Teens That Will Land Me In Jail)

So in today's episode, I count off CNN's truly disturbing attempts to cast a teen version of Sex and the City with a bunch of jailbait celebrities. Speaking of jailbait, today's shoutout goes to two teenage girls who have absolutely nothing in common except for their alleged (and highly dubious) desire to marry me. If you read the comments (like I do while wearing a velvet robe and sitting in a chair of fine mahogany and leather) you might realize I'm talking about our own Nerdlette and Direwookie. But which to marry? One lives in Canada (somewhere); the other lives in Texas. One is a future Greenpeace activist; the other shoots guns and likes Sarah Palin's style One looks like Tina Fey's punk rock niece; the other, the love child of Jamie Lee Curtis and Nicole Kidman. I can't decide. I have so many questions: Will their boyfriends mind? How about my wife? And just how illegal would it be for me to even exchange an erotic email with them? (Answer: very, very illegal). Ultimately, I think this should be decided by cage match, but that's my answer for everything.

To turn on reply notifications, click here

59 Comments

Load Comments

More Blogs

4 Crazy Ways The Human Body's Changing In Our Own Lifetimes

Our bodies are changing.

123

5 Celebrities With Arguably More Interesting Parents

Many of today's celebrities have some real surprises in their family trees.

81

5 Meltdowns That Went Viral Before The Internet Existed

Everybody loves a good old-fashioned meltdown.

86

5 Iconic Movies Saved By Last-Minute Changes

Some of your favorite movie moments were added months after everyone went home.

109

5 'Romantic Triangle' Characters We Just Feel Sorry For

Fictional love triangles are always a rigged game.

150

5 Actors Who Keep Playing Weirdly Specific Roles

They say the definition of insanity is doing the same thing again and again and expecting a different result.

84